I just wanted everything to stop. 
The pain. 
The noise. 
Me. 

To stop breathing and let the darkness take me into its silent embrace. 

Finally, I mustered the courage to go through with it. 
It’s done now. 

What a relief. 
I feel so at peace. 

But apparently, even here, silence isn’t part of the deal. 

Voice 1: Great, perfect, TERRIFIC. Just what I was going for on a Sunday morning. Who will find you like this?! Mom? Brother? Have you thought about this before you… well… “offed” yourself? You didn’t even bother to run this by me first! You… you just did it! This isn’t a Nike commercial, you know? 

Voice 2: Oh my god, shut up! I thought dying meant I wouldn’t have to listen to your voice anymore. Always on and on about the future and plans and work, enough already! I’m exhausted thinking about the future. 

Voice 1: You were exhausted. Past tense. No more future for us, remember? 

Voice 2: Whatever. I’ve made this decision and you have to respect it. 

Voice 1: Uuh, no I don’t. You made this decision — for you — and “I” am a victim here. I wanted to live and do all these great things— 

Voice 2: Oh, come on. Why didn’t you then? Do all these great things? Where were you when I was depressed, lying in bed for months, not showering, my apartment a mess? Huh? 

Voice 1: I was there! I kept saying, let’s go for a walk. Just to the park and back. Something small. I tried. It was impossible to get you to do anything.
Well, apart from this. “THIS” you had no problem committing to. Haha, see — commit? — What? 

Voice 2: What?

Voice 1: Commit, because you, you know… 

Voice 2: Ah, right. Yeah, I get it. 

Voice 1: Come on, that was funny. Okay, maybe not ha-ha funny. 

Voice 2: … 

Voice 1: Never mind then. Are you going to be sad and like this in the afterlife too? Because this kind of sucks. 

Voice 2: I don’t know. This is new for me too. Now, can you be quiet? 

Voice 1: Yeah, I can see this is going to be fun.